Living the Dream - Full Series

Standing up there, I felt that basically that my career's over ... I'll probably never work in this country, or the Southern Hemisphere, again.

– Stephen Hall (Mule) on parading in a leopard skin G-string, in the swap your underwear contest in episode one

He's a nice guy ... we can't do this to him.

– Stephen Hall (Mule) on Sam, in episode one

...He's smoother than a gravy sandwich.

– Sam describes presenter Mark Ferguson

This was meant to be about putting all of this pressure on this guy, and seeing what would happen to him — he is totally calm. Everybody around him though — the actors, the production, me — we are sweating bricks.

– Mark Ferguson on Sam, in episode three

He seems to forgive her for all these faults, and kind of take her for a damsel in distress.

– Sarah Thompson (who plays 'Tiffany' the Rich Bitch) on trying to get Sam to dislike her, in episode three

We go further and further and further into an outrageous reality and at every stage we take a huge deep breath and go 'Oh my god, we're about to do this. This is insane.' It's the most ulcer-inducing show I've ever been involved in.

– Mark Ferguson describes working on the show, The NZ Herald (EG pullout), 5 August 2004, page 4

One of you will soon be sent back to the cruel world in which we found you.

– Host Mark Ferguson prepares the survivors for another elimination, in episode eight

There are times in the full moon when men are reduced to animals.

– Host Mark Ferguson, in episode nine

What would you do if your entire world turned out to be fake? If an army of writers, producers and actors spent six months creating TV's most elaborate experiment, around you.

– Host and narrator Mark Ferguson introduces each episode

The premise of this completely fake 2004 reality show has stuck with me. Sure, I was 12 at the time that it aired, but it's scientifically proven that this is the peak age of insisting that you are the star of The Truman Show after you watch it one rainy lunchtime at intermediate.

– Alex Casey of The Spinoff, writes about Living the Dream for a 2016 NZ Herald list of NZ's worst reality TV shows

In the real world, Sam would expect to dominate in the physical challenges. So we've rigged them to make sure that he loses...

– Host Mark Ferguson explains the inner workings of the show, in episode two

We did not realise how smart he was; we did not realise he had such great observation skills; we did not realise that he would notice so much about the production itself. If I'd known the standard of his observation skills, I don't think we would have chosen him.

– Executive Producer Julie Christie on Sam potentially being too clever for the show, at the end of episode one

Sometimes I wonder whether he's the actor, and we're the ones being scammed on.

– Sarah Thomson (Tiffany) on Sam, at the start of episode three

I was thinking 'crickey'.

– Sam describes his reaction to the unexpected appearance of Mary's boyfriend William (Simon Ward), while Sam is chained to Mary, in episode five

You're obviously the dream of one person, but you are a nightmare to a lot of others. And if there is any justice in the world, then you will find it.

– Host Mark Ferguson makes it clear what he thinks of Mick 'the prick' (Jason Fitch), at one of the weekly eliminations

It's really great in a cast full of horrible, not so nice stereotypes that he [Sam] comes across as the victory of the good Kiwi male, because he's making us all look like idiots and he's this wonderful, reserved, sensitive, wise person who's very caring towards the opposite sex.

– Sarah Thomson (Tiffany), in episode two

...you are dead to us.

– Host Mark Ferguson at the weekly elimination ceremony (in a line originally used in Living the Dream's forerunner, The Joe Schmo Show)

Why does all the drama have to happen to me?

– Sam lists some of the crazy things that have happened to him on the show, in episode seven

...you can't doing this to people! You can't keep treating people like amoebas for your own pleasure and your own entertainment. I'm going to have this reported to the International Association of F***ing Reality TV Show Hosts. This is too f***ing much.

– Host Mark Fergusion spits the dummy after being asked to dress up as a baby dummy, in episode eight

You're a meat puppet Mark, and frankly at the moment possibly one of the most morally suspect. You should make silence your best friend.

– Network executive Andrew Shaw pretends to dress down presenter Mark Ferguson while Sam watches, in episode seven